March 6th would have been Aspen's 10th Birthday!
Summer and I were in Cancun on the 6th.
It felt a little strange not being home for her Birthday.
Early in the morning I got up and got on the internet
and went to her blog and read about the day she was born.
It was quite emotional to relive all of that,
but for a moment I felt so connected to her.
10 years later and all of the emotion of that day is still there.
That is not really a bad thing...............
I can't help but wonder what she would be like at 10 years of age,
and how different our lives might be..........
But, it is what it is,
and I will always be grateful for the short time we had her.
James and the family that was home went to the cemetery
and shared some memories of her.
I got home on the 8th and took some flowers and gifts to her..........
She will never be forgotten.
If I see a picture and it makes me cry,
I always buy it.
I have pictures that I have bought and never even hung
on the wall because I don't have a place for them.
This is the latest picture that I found that made me cry.
This picture is perfect.....
It is Aspen,
little bald chemo head, same big ears that she had,
chubby cheeks, and she loved faces.
Always had to touch them.
Also there were two male nurses, Rick and Irish,
that had beards and she was always grabbing at them.
I imagine she would do the same to the Savior............
I always buy it.
I have pictures that I have bought and never even hung
on the wall because I don't have a place for them.
This is the latest picture that I found that made me cry.
This picture is perfect.....
It is Aspen,
little bald chemo head, same big ears that she had,
chubby cheeks, and she loved faces.
Always had to touch them.
Also there were two male nurses, Rick and Irish,
that had beards and she was always grabbing at them.
I imagine she would do the same to the Savior............
Happy Birthday Aspen
We love you!!
1 comment:
There is so much passion and love when you talk about Aspen. I know it must have hurt, I have heard that kind of pain compared to in only one other circumstance. I hope you never have to go through any pain like that ever again.
It is obvious you have so much love in you and she would have been the lucky recipient of it, it will happen in the next life, you will love and raise her... it will be a happy time for you.
Sometimes things dont work out like we hope or expect them to, and we may never know why in this life but one day we will and we will understand at that time and feel comfort at that time that we did not feel when we were going through the ordeal itself.
I am impressed with how strong you are. You show your love and caring so easily but you also show your strength. You may not think you are strong but you are so very strong. God did not intend for us to outlive our children, but it happens to only the strongest of us. It is at times like these that we discover who we really are. Are we people who are insensitive to those who are dealing with it also or are we giving and loving and caring for others. You have shown you are the latter, you are so giving, always giving and loving and you take too much burden on yourself and too much blame for things that are not your fault. While others will shift their blame to others, you take your responsibilities and others share also. A true giver you are, caring for others in your time of difficulty.
I look up to you and feel honored to know you, thank you for teaching me.
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